It's All About Joy!

The Magic of Meditation

I’ve been struggling lately, and I’m thrilled to admit that. Who doesn’t like a good struggle after all?! After riding a high from May to September where it was safe to say I was the funkiest, freshest JoyGirl! around, I crashed and burned and became more along the lines of a funked-out JoyGirl. If it had lasted just one day, I could have written it off to bad hair. Unfortunately, this funk had teeth and held on for a few weeks. Egads! (And I still have the bite marks on my thigh to prove it, although unless you’re my boyfriend, y’all can’t see it!)

In those moments when I’m feeling down, it’s not like everything’s wrong in my life. Instead it’s simply that the shine has worn off the apple. My eyes, ears, and mind only perceive the very surfacy things in this world, and that surface is covered in grime. I can’t see through the illusion, get stuck inside my head, my head then overanalyzes everything and takes me down some very scary, dark pathways where lions and tigers and bears hide out (oh my!).

Definitely not a fun place to be.

When I’m in those moments, I tend to call on the Universe (God, the angels, Auntie Em, anyone who will listen) in a very separate – and desperate – way, “Please send me a sign. Please give me something to let me know it will all be okay.” On the contrary, when I’m feeling blissful, I recognize that I am one with the Universe, so everything around me is a sign and I work in tandem with God, creating magic on a daily basis.

But I digress. Back to that sign I asked for. It came from a new blog I started reading a month ago. If you haven’t seen what Stacey Shipman’s up to over at her blog, I encourage you to check it out. She’s a great writer with a very open, loving, and wonderfully discerning viewpoint that’s strongly aligned with spirituality and all things yoga. Interestingly, her web site crashed a few weeks ago, and she had to rebuild it. As a result, because I’m on her email subscription list, I was getting old posts blasted to me as she restored her archives.

Well, the other night I was pretty much at the end of my rope emotionally. Just before I went to sleep, however (and a few hours after asking for a sign), I heard my email beep indicating that I had a new message. My inbox had been pretty bare that day, so of course I checked it out and saw that it was an archived post from Stacey Shipman's site. The moment I read the title, though, I knew it was so much more. It was the Universe talking to me, or rather, extending a helping hand. Here’s a snippet:

When Meditation Helps Find Clarity

"...  Will she continue to meditate regularly? That I don’t know. I hope she remembers the success of this experience and reaches for meditation the next time she needs it instead of…something else.

"Life doesn’t always hand us easy to solve problems, sometimes more time and more action is needed. Often a little peace and quiet – sitting without any distraction – can help, even if you only have a few minutes. Sometimes it’s that stirring within that needs to be stirred and released, not stuffed, in order to ‘let it flow’ and continue moving in a forward direction."

Ah, meditation. The thing I’d been abandoning for a few weeks in favor of rushing around like a madwoman. The thing that always seemed to drop to the bottom of my to-do list, even though other activities like two-hour workouts, watching Conan O’Brien, reading my favorite books, or other such varied nonsense got my full attention.

Suddenly I understood that meditation would point me back in that wonderfully blissful direction and get me off of those scary paths I’d unwittingly chanced upon.

Meditation.

Meditation.

Meditation.

15 minutes here, 12 minutes there… 8 minutes is fine, too. As Stacey said, “Often…sitting without any distraction…can help, even if you only have a few minutes. Sometimes it’s that stirring within that needs to be stirred and released…in order to ‘let it flow’ and continue moving in a forward direction."

And so it was for me.

I’m thrilled to say that the funky fresh JoyGirl! is back, and it only took twelve minutes of quietude and introspection. All I can say is, “There’s no place like joy… There’s no place like joy…”

Oh, and also a huge thank you to Stacey!

What My Buddy The Body Teaches

I’m a big believer that thoughts become things; no surprise there. Going along with this, my experience has been that every thought I think creates a corresponding energy, which in turn affects my body. When I’m extremely joyful and loving, my body is relaxed and supple. When I’m upset or stressed, my body is tense. If I stay upset or stressed, the tension condenses and manifests as an imbalance somewhere. Sometimes it’s small, like an ache or pain that goes away quickly. Sometimes, though, it’s bigger and more serious, like when my appendix became inflamed and had to be removed five years ago, or when I had a five-day long tension migraine that doctors thought was meningitis.

In any case, I’ve learned to become buddies with my body because it always (always always!) tells me what beliefs I’m holding onto at any given moment that need addressing.

I know that the Universe is consistently trying to keep me on a good path and one that’s in my highest good. Nevertheless, sometimes in my easily distracted ways I get caught up in diversions that my conscious mind decides it would rather pursue. So I veer off-course a bit and don’t heed the prompts I’m given indicating that course corrections are needed. I’m grateful to my body, though, for stepping in and reminding me when my thought patterns are not in alignment with where I need to be.

My body is like Cher’s character in Moonstruck when she slapped Nicholas Cage across the face and yelled, “Snap out of it!” If my body develops an ailment, that’s its way of telling me to wake up and start paying attention. When I had my appendix removed, for example, I was in a relationship that hadn’t been working for quite some time, but I held onto it because it was easier to do that than go through the drama of giving it up. The human appendix is more or less a useless organ that we’ve evolved way beyond needing. For me, it was symbolic of the relationship I was in. I knew the relationship didn’t serve my highest good anymore. Really, I did. But I dragged my heels in releasing it once and for all, and finally my subconscious had it with me and decided to use the appendix to flag my attention…Or slap me across the face, as it were. Of course back then, I didn’t get it. Today, however, I better understand that thoughts become things and our bodies and minds are intricately connected. Paying attention to my body, for instance, helps me comprehend what’s going on inside my head.

Nowadays, at the first sign of trouble in my body, I look to see what mental pattern I may be toting around that led to its occurrence. Lower back always represents some sort of financial strain or discomfort in my life. Hips represent balance and my ability to move forward with ease. Last year when I was unsure of my job and the direction in which I was headed, I had a combination ankle-slash-foot problem that only healed itself once I resigned from that position.

I now use my body as a litmus test for what the monkeys in my mind have been up to – particularly those subconscious ones that are tougher to reach. I’m learning more and more how to consciously align myself with my highest good and honor the Divine being that I am.

I’d love to say I’m always ahead of the eight ball and that my thoughts are rosy and loving all the time, thus keeping my body in perfect working order. But that’s simply not the case. In my oh-so-human form, I’m prone to slipups. I am grateful, however, for every new trick I learn along the way as I continue to evolve as an awakened and well being.

What about you? Does your body talk to you and let you know where your beliefs may need to be realigned?

** ** ** ** ** **

Happy Birthday to my beautiful aunt (Sunday), my niece, M.E. and good friend, Jim (Monday), and to the guy who represents everything I ever wanted from love and so much more (Tuesday).

Must Reads: Bloggers I Love

(Part I in what will likely be a long series!)

The best parts of my mornings are sending and receiving email and reading my favorite blogs. The list keeps growing since there is so much good content out there. Every so often I am compelled to just shout from the rooftops how wonderful I think all these people are who write about joy, love, and spirituality.

So consider this post a rooftop, and here’s me shouting some of my favorites:

Peggy at Serendipity Smiles wrote about overcoming her perfectionist tendencies and had this little gem of encouragement in there: “I don’t have to strive for  perfection today, tomorrow or next week. I’m perfect just as I am…I can be a four today, a five tomorrow, a two on Friday.  It’s all good.”
Click to read Dreaming Perfection

Jodi at Joy Discovered wrote about truth – what it is and what it isn’t (and how we frequently mistake non-truths for truth). If you want an eye-opening read, you absolutely have to check out this post. Here’s a great snippet from it, “…how many times have you recounted an incident, and as much as you try to tell only the truth you realize it is quite impossible; you realize that without the other person about whom you are reporting sitting there with you, recounting her side exactly as she experienced it, you don’t actually know the truth. In those situations you realize there is a difference between facts and perceptions.”
Click to read The Truth Will Set You Free

Positively Present always has a fresh energy in what she writes, and this post, in particular, took me all the way back to childhood. See for yourself how growing up is optional.
Click to read Growing Up Is Optional

Nadia at Happy Lotus writes so compellingly and with such peace and love... From day 1, I've been a fan. She wrote a post about the myth of perfectionism, which I loved since I’m a recovering perfectionist. If you find yourself falling into this category, her post is a must-read.
Click to read My Perfection Myth
 
Liara at Dream Builders Australia had the most fantastic post about dis-ease in our bodies, and how to not only view it differently, but in some cases, undo it. If you’ve suffered anything from a cold to emergency surgery, this post has something in it for you.
Click to read 7 Ways to Re-frame Apparent Dis-ease

Mark at The Naked Soul (love that title, by the way!) dissected the topic of self-worth in this post called “What Is Our Value?” Do we use money, love, or other external circumstances to determine how valuable we are? Or can we go inside and recognize that simply by being alive, we’re more worthwhile than we ever dreamed?
Click to read What Is Our Value?

Tess at The Bold Life had a guest blogger (Jan Lundy) who wrote a fabulous post describing how the first 30 minutes of our day sets the tone for how the rest will go. Did you know that? It made me grateful for my morning routine, which is infused with peacefulness and love. Read this to learn how to make more of your days enjoyable, right from the start. (And PS - Tess is also a brilliant writer... so I'll include one of the posts she wrote on Jan's blog here, as well!)
Click to read Mind Fitness: How About a Workout For a Healthy Mind
Click to read 75 Ways to Make The World a Better Place to Be

Oh my God, I laughed so hard when I first read about Millie on Suzen’s blog Erasing the Bored that I nearly fell off my chair. Millie is old, tells it like it is, and isn’t afraid to fart (that’s right… fart!). Please, please, please read this if you want some amazing “living right” advice and also want to laugh.
Click to read Millie Wisdom: Lessons in Living

Lance at The Jungle of Life writes inspiringly and gently, and quite often so succinctly that I’m awed. I absolutely loved this quote he shared from Steve Jobs, founder of Apple, and was greatly encouraged by it. If you’re looking to do what you love or find more meaning in life, read this!
Click to read Sunday Thought for the Day, June 21

Katie at You Can’t Say That on the Internet! is constantly writing from such a space of love – for both her life and her incredible partner, Patty – that I’m moved to tears. The love Katie and Patty share, and how they keep their love growing, is inspirational. The post Joyful Creators is a great testament to how they live their spirituality and love for one another right out loud, and in doing so, positively affect all of us who share this planet with them. Take a look.
Click to read Joyful Creators

And if you like food – to make or to eat – I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention Patty’s site, affectionately called The Joyful Chef. I frequently read her step-by-step posts that are full of the most delicious pictures and think, “now I’m hungry.” Best of all, I’ve met Katie and Patty, who live on the opposite coast as me, and they’re even better and more delicious in-person than they are on their blogs! See what Patty’s been up to by reading her latest.
Click to read The Joyful Chef

There are more – my gosh there are more. So please know that this is just a start. I’ll be doing another “Man I love these bloggers” entry in the future and including even more of the fabulous writers who fuel my days and weeks with their brilliance, insights, and love.

You Might Be An Empath If…

(In case you are, here’s a way to help stop random energy absorption & resulting body pains)

Have you ever been told you were a “sensitive” or an “empath?” I was, about nine years ago. At the time I thought it was cool – like it somehow set me apart and allowed me a unique perspective on healing.

Being an empath, though, has its so-called drawbacks. One of those is absorbing other people’s pain.

A few weeks ago, I was sitting about two feet from a friend who just had shoulder surgery. We were working on a project together when I noticed that suddenly, and rather inexplicably, the upper right quadrant of my back started screaming at me. It took me by surprise, since I hadn’t worked that area with weights earlier in the day, and I’m not prone to pain in that portion of my back. A minute or two later, my friend started grunting and expressing discomfort. I asked if he was all right, and he told me his back was bothering him. A light bulb went on over my head, so I asked, “What part of your back?” He said it was his upper right scapular area. I laughed and said, “Yeah, okay, that explains it.” He looked at me with surprise, so I went on and explained, “The minute we sat down, that same part of my back started to ache, and I knew it didn’t belong to me! I have a tendency to absorb other people’s pain. I’m just glad I know who it belongs to!”

True story: as an empath, I’m like a sponge. I was much more aware of it years ago when I first started on my spiritual path, but until recently, I sort of pushed it to the back of my mind. When it dawned on me three weeks ago that yes, I’m absorbing other people’s ailments, I decided to ask two healer friends what to do. Both of them told me to shut down my lower three chakras.

“That will do it?” I asked optimistically. According to them, the lower three chakras (base, sacral, solar plexus) are the culprit, so whenever I’m around people who are ill, depressed, buzzy, what-have-you, the best thing to do is visualize those three chakras closing up.

Both friends gave me different methods for doing so (and both work, by the way):

• visualize the chakras twisting to the “off” position
• visualize a black cloth being dropped over the chakras (or a curtain being pulled closed to cover them)

I put the methods to use, and since that time my body has felt FAN-freakin’-TASTIC! Not only did I stop absorbing random back, neck, shoulder or other aches and pains, but my head --- which for years has been prone to migraines --- has been operating as if it’s brand new! I’ve had one migraine in the past month. One! (I’m used to seven or eight.)

I never realized how much stuff was seeping inside me that didn’t belong to me. Now that I’m aware, you can bet any time I head out in public, I pull the drapes closed on my lower three chakras.

For more information on what it means to be an Empath or Sensitive, visit this web page: http://hubpages.com/hub/Psychism--7-Signs-Youre-an-Empath

Homemade Gatorade

I love cardio workouts and do an hour each day split between the elliptical and running on the treadmill.

I'm also increasingly cautious about what foods and drinks I put into my body. I tend to avoid anything with high-fructose corn syrup, artificial sweeteners, coloring, flavors, etc. Honestly, I just don't want that foreign "stuff" inside of me.

So when I work out for extended periods of time, rather than reach for Gatorade to replace the salt and electrolytes I've lost, I prepare my own. I feel infinitely better about drinking it, and it makes me feel so much better while running. (NOTE: I discovered a few years ago that some of my really bad headaches come from not having enough salt in my system.)

HOMEMADE ELECTROLYTE DRINK:

• 4 oz. orange juice

• 12 oz. water

• 1 - 2 tsp. salt

Mix together and adjust based on your preference. It should taste salty & sweet, but not be too much of either. You always want more water in there than juice.

I keep an old glass Snapple bottle on-hand as my "water bottle," and that's what I put it in.

Easy, inexpensive, and oh-so-good for you.

Why I Love Burt’s Bees

Anyone who knows me knows that I “heart” Burt’s Bees. I used to like any kind of lip balm, but that was before I fell in-love with Burt and his fuzzy little friends.

Why Burt’s Bees? It’s not just because it’s organic and natural, and doesn’t contain petroleum-based ingredients like Blistex and Chapstick do. (NOTE: Petroleum actually dries our skin out, and is derived from the same stuff that goes into gasoline. Ick!) Burt’s Bees actually reconditioned my lips so they felt better and have stayed that way over time.

On top of that, I found some other great uses for it:

• Speeds healing time on cuts and scrapes (apply directly to wounded area, just like you would with Neosporin, and then cover with a bandage)
• Minimizes scarring on facial blemishes
• Moisturizes cuticles
• Keeps runaway eyebrows in place
• Helps raw, red noses feel and look better during cold and allergy season (if you’ve blown your nose so much that the skin beneath your nostrils is dry, try Burt's)
• Helps iPod earbuds stay in place (apply a tiny bit directly to inner edge of ears where the earbuds sit)

See for yourself why Burt’s Bees is such a great product and if you think of any other cool uses, please let me know!

~ Be well, be joyful, and be naturally moisturized ~

Freedom From Addiction Through “Being”

From Wayne Dyer’s Choosing Your Own Greatness lecture series

“When you take something into your body that you know isn’t good for you or that you don’t like, or let’s say it’s a cigarette if that’s what you’re trying to quit, or if it’s alcohol or caffeine or too much sugar or whatever it is. And [when] you consume that, what happens is [that] as it goes through you it becomes you, you become it. You become one with the poison. And every time you do that, you are the poison. You’re not consuming poison…it’s not that. That’s one step removed from being. Being means you are it, it is you. You are one…with the poison. All you have to understand with any addiction that you may have – any kind of addiction – is that once you become the treatment and you stop being the poison it’s not even a challenge anymore.

“'I am no longer it. It is no longer me.’ When you get that - when you understand that notion of being and begin to apply that in your life - it’s just phenomenal. It’s like in religion, people are looking for the Ten Commandments, but in the Bible it says ‘live of the truth.’ The whole idea of the kingdom of heaven [is that] it is within. It is what you carry around with you. And when you are the Ten Commandments, you don’t need them. You simply are being that. And when that is you and you are it, you are what Christ called ‘of the truth.’ Not looking for it, not trying to get it from someone else, not hoping that someone else can reveal it to you. It is what you are.

“When you are looking for love, it will always elude you. When you are looking for happiness, it will always elude you. When you become those things, it’s just there. And it begins to own you. You don’t have it, it has you.

“The first benefit…in approaching life from this...[perspective] is that you will see dramatic changes in the negative kinds of lifestyle things you have accepted as a way of life for you. Smoking becomes something that’s almost too easy to give up… You don’t tell yourself it’s difficult. You don’t tell yourself that 'I’m going to go through a lot of pain and that it’s going to be a troublesome thing for me...' You simply become a person who no longer wants to poison himself or herself, and looking at cigarettes as something that you’re pouring inside of you – this self you feel so good about – is just impossible after awhile. It owns you. This health approach. This wellness approach begins to own you.”

Lower-Fat, Higher Fiber Pumpkin Spice Cookies with Glaze

Every once in awhile, the urge will grab me to make a really small batch of delicious cookies. Last weekend that's what happened. I love anything pumpkin, so I decided to find and then alter a pumpkin spice cookie recipe. The results are below (and they're delicious!). (This batch will make eight small, soft cookies.)

Ingredients:

• 1/2 cup and 1 tablespoon whole wheat pastry flour
• 1/4 teaspoon baking powder
• 1/4 teaspoon baking soda
• 1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
• 1/8 teaspoon ground nutmeg
• 1/8 teaspoon ground ginger
• 1/8 teaspoon salt
• 1 tablespoon light butter, softened
• 1/4 cup white sugar
• 4 tablespoons canned pumpkin puree
• 1/4 egg
• 1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract

Glaze:

• 1/4 cup and 3 tablespoons confectioners' sugar
• 2 teaspoons low-fat milk
• 3/4 teaspoon melted light butter
• 1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract

Baking:

• Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Combine flour, baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon, ginger, ground cloves, and salt; set aside.

• In a medium bowl, cream together the butter and sugar. Add pumpkin, egg, and vanilla to butter mixture, and beat until creamy. Mix in dry ingredients. Drop on cookie sheet by tablespoonfuls; flatten slightly.

• Bake for 12 minutes in the preheated oven. Cool cookies, then drizzle glaze on top.

To Make Glaze: Combine confectioners' sugar, milk, melted butter, and vanilla. Add milk as needed, to achieve drizzling consistency.

What To Do If You’re Out of Powdered Sugar:
When I made this recipe initially, I didn’t have confectioners’ sugar. I found directions on the web, though, and here’s how to make it:

• ¼ cup granulated sugar

• 1 tsp cornstarch

Combine in coffee grinder or blender until powdery and white.

Nutritional Value (two cookies)
Calories 210
Total Fat 4.2g (6% daily value)
Saturated Fat 2.5g (12% daily value)
Cholesterol 21mg (7% daily value)
Sodium 183mg (8% daily value)
Total Carbohydrates 41.3g (14% daily value)
Dietary Fiber 1.1g (4% daily value)
Sugars 26.5g
Protein 2.5g
Vitamin A 50%    
Vitamin C 1%
Calcium 3%
Iron 6%

Natural Remedies for Migraines

It wasn’t long ago that I scoffed at the idea of natural remedies. Thinking it was folksy stuff that only gypsies would try, I stuck to my tried and true western medicines. Years later, though, I fell in-love with a more natural approach, mostly because I’m repulsed by the pharmaceutical industry and the economic advantage they take of the masses (especially seniors… ugh). The other reason is because I truly believe in eastern approaches to maintaining wellbeing. After all, the human body was designed to stay alive (think about that for a second). It’s only through our deeply held beliefs (mainly fears) that we fall into patterns of illness and disease.

So when it comes to migraines, I’ve been experimenting with more natural approaches to controlling them. The first thing I did starting four or five years ago was to recognize the patterns surrounding them.

A few things I learned:

Bad Experiences Can Bring On Migraines (aka – Sometimes Migraines Are Trying To Protect Me). Five years ago, I had a weeklong migraine that was so bad medical professionals thought it was viral meningitis. The pain barely responded to Vicodin, and it took four days to subside. I couldn’t even sit upright without vomiting. That happened to be around the same time that I started what I soon discovered was a very toxic relationship. I knew going in that it wasn’t a pure experience, but was so desperate for companionship that I settled. I even justified it to myself in my rational brain. Subconsciously, though, I knew better and man oh man did my unconscious beliefs poke me but hard! They manifested themselves as the most painful migraine I’ve ever had in my life.
Since that time, I’ve had a handful of other “bad” experiences that brought on migraine attacks, and in each instance I knew I was trying to warn myself of something. Whenever I’m wrestling with something toxic on a subconscious level, the results come up as dragons in my head.

Hormones Affect My Migraine Schedule. Through careful observation I’ve learned that my migraines are cyclical. Every month, I have a ten-day window during which I’m more prone to developing migraines and it corresponds to my menstrual cycle. If I’m not extra careful during those ten days, I can set myself off in an extremely painful way. (Being careful means drinking plenty of water, not exercising so hard that I throw my electrolytes off-balance, getting lots of sleep, avoiding sugar late at night, not drinking too much alcohol, etc.) By learning my migraines’ schedule, I can better prepare myself and work to prevent the outliers (the migraines I get simply because I’m careless).

Salt (Electrolytes) Help. I’ve lived my life with a sweet tooth the size of Texas. Salt was never anything I cared much for and for the longest time my diet contained next to none. That is, until I accidentally learned that salt can actually help my migraines. I always wondered why I was prone to attacks right after exercising. Turns out, my electrolyte balance was off and by eating more salt (or drinking a homemade Gatorade-like concoction of OJ, salt & water) I could ward off the pain.

Going One Step Further: Natural Remedies

Even with recognition of why and when my migraines tend to develop, there’s still more I can do. Starting a month ago, I investigated natural approaches to controlling them. The three I’m currently working with are magnesium, Coenzyme Q10, and feverfew. I began with just the magnesium and it immediately helped with my outlier migraines. I’ve since added in Coenzyme Q10 and feverfew to see how effective that combination might be. In the materials I’ve read, it can take up to three or four months for alternative remedies to take root and do their job. Patience is required! In the meantime, if you suffer from regular migraines take a look below and see if one of the natural options might be for you. (Note: As with anything health-related, consult your doctor before trying these out. Your doctor can warn you of any potentially dangerous drug interactions, as well as give you proper dosing.)

1. Feverfew. Studies suggest that feverfew taken daily in capsule format may reduce the occurrence of attacks in patients who experience migraines. Take 100 - 300 mg, up to four times daily, standardized to contain 0.2 - 0.4% parthenolides. Feverfew supplements may also be carbon dioxide extracted. For these, take 6.25 mg, 3 times daily, for up to 16 weeks. (More info at: http://www.umm.edu/altmed/articles/feverfew-000243.htm)
2. Magnesium. “Several studies have evaluated the effectiveness of magnesium for migraines and have had promising results. In one study, oral magnesium (600 mg per day) or a placebo were given to 81 people with migraines. After nine weeks, the frequency of migraines was reduced by 41.6 percent in the group taking magnesium, compared to 15.8 percent in the group taking the placebo. The only reported side effects were diarrhea in 18.6 percent of people and digestive irritation in 4.7 percent.” (More info at: http://altmedicine.about.com/cs/headachemigraine/a/Migraine.htm)
3. Coenzyme Q10 (Co Q10). In studies, 150 mg a day has been shown to reduce migraines by up to 50% at the end of a four-month trial.
4. 5-HTP (5-Hydroxytryptophan). This is a compound produced in the body from the amino acid tryptophan. It is used in the body to make the neurotransmitter serotonin and the hormone melatonin. Recommended dosage is 100 to 200 mg three times daily.

Other Options:

• Butterbur
• Fish Oil
• Acupuncture
• Biofeedback
• Chiropractic
• Magnets
• Massage Therapy

Rewording Affirmations: Tweaking Them Slightly In Order To Change Results Dramatically

While on vacation in Jordan and Egypt recently, I learned the power of rewording under-performing affirmations to attain better results. Many people know how useful positive affirmations can be to help draw to us that which we desire. Saying things over and over to ourselves like, “I am successful” can actually help change deeply held beliefs to the contrary and steer us toward achievement. Sometimes, though, no matter how often we repeat positive phrases, the things we say we want neglect to materialize. 

Last week I learned a little trick in this regard. I was having trouble falling asleep early in our trip (which, oddly enough, turned out to be the norm for the rest of vacation). Usually when I don’t sleep enough, I’m susceptible to getting sick. The one thing I knew I did not want to be on vacation was sick. Yet as I lay in the hotel room, staring at the ceiling for what seemed like hours, my mind raced in a panicked frenzy.

“If you don’t sleep soon, you’ll risk getting sick. Oh my gosh, I think I’m developing post-nasal drip. Damnit, stay healthy, stay healthy, stay healthy, stay healthy.” I was repeating that phrase fanatically as I drifted in and out of very shallow sleep. Then suddenly, I heard my partner’s voice in my head as if responding to my incessant mental chatter, which was trying in vain to keep me from succumbing to illness. He said, “Be tough, Megan. You’re tough.”

Swiftly I began repeating that phrase over and over in my head, “I’m tough. I’m tough. I’m tough.” Within moments, the post-nasal drip I thought I sensed disappeared and I felt my body ease into perfect sleep. When I awoke in the morning, I felt fantastic despite having only gotten four or five hours of sleep total (about three shy of what I ordinarily believe I need to function properly).

That’s when I realized something: by shifting my mental posture from “stay healthy” – which implied I might be anything but – to “I’m tough,” I was reaffirming the condition I really wanted: strong, perfect health.

Sometimes when we do affirmations or make those positive statements we know are necessary in order to manifest what we want, we’re unwittingly coming from a compromised state of mind. We don’t do it purposefully, yet I think most of us know when our affirmations aren’t working. I’ve had lots of moments when I end up thinking (after I create the opposite condition I say I wanted), “I must not have wanted it enough…” or “I guess I was meant to get XYZ instead of ABC.” I’m not sure of the mechanics of it, but somehow I think the words we choose backfire when combined with some of our most tightly held (many times invisible) beliefs.

In my case, the words I was using to initially ward off what felt like impending illness had me coming from a victimized standpoint. I already felt like I was slipping into sickness, so the words “stay healthy” were a last-ditch effort to hang on to something I was destined to lose. By finding a new phrase that essentially had the same meaning but subconsciously meshed differently with my belief system, I was able to achieve what I wanted, only from a fresh angle. “Be tough” or “I’m tough” turned out to be the right phrasing to reinforce that I’m already coming from a place of hardiness. All I ever have to do is realign myself with it.

Bottom line: if you’ve been doing affirmations or trying to manifest what you want but it doesn’t seem to be working, try changing your phrasing just a little bit. It could be exactly the thing to move you from a sometimes successful manifester to an all-the-time successful manifester.